dating application 2006

perhaps if we single folks took the time to get to know each other and ask those important questions up front, there would be a better sucess rate in long-term relationships and marriages. the following "dating application" was forwarded to me by some friends. it is funny, but i don't see why they couldn't be adapted for real dating world use:

---

for the girls
Dating Application

Name
First________________ Middle _____________ Last_____________
Address _______________________________________
City _________________________ State _____ Zip ___________
Home # ______________________________ Cell#______________

Do you live with any of the following: (circle)
Grandmother
Parents
Mother
Father
Girlfriend
Baby Mama
Alone
Shelter
Wife
Auntie
Other: _________________


Weight _______ Height ________

Ethnicity:
Black
Hispanic
White
Other:_________________

D.O.B. ______ Age ____ SS# _____-___-_________

Any children (Circle one) yes no

If yes, how many _______

How many baby mamas? _________

If more than one, please name below.

Use separate sheet of paper if need more room.

1. _______________________________________
2. _______________________________________
3. _______________________________________

Do you owe child support? (Circle one) Yes No Don't Know

*If your ex is getting state benefits (childcare, food stamps, etc), then you owe somebody something. Especially tax payers. Stop here and go take care of your dang kids.)

Ever been married (circle) yes no
If yes, how many times? _______

Are you or have you ever been on the Down Low? (Circle one) yes no

*Please use a separate sheet of paper and list goals and accomplishments.


Did you graduate from high school? (circle one) yes no

Name/address of high school:__________________________

Have you received any of the following? (Circle one)
GED Diploma

*If you did not complete any of the above, please stop here and return to school.

Any college? (circle one) yes no still enrolled graduated

Name/address of college (copy od transcripts required): _____________

Have you ever been to prison or convicted of a crime? (Circle one) yes no

If yes, reason? (be very specific)

________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________


*If you have answered yes to the above question, please STOP HERE and call your P.O. immediately.

Employed? (Circle one) yes no
*If no, please stop here.

If yes, where and how long?
_______________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________

Do you have health insurance? (Circle one) Yes No

When did you last visit the dentist? ____________________

When was your last doctor visit?_____________________

Reason: ____________________________________________ ____________________________________________________
__________________________________________________

List any (all) illnesses. Use separate sheet of paper if needed.
_______________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________________

Do you have or have you had any of the following?
(Circle all that may apply)

Hepetitis A B or C
Herpes
Mononucleosis
HIV/AIDS
The Bird Flu
West Nile Virus
Crabs
Chlamydia
Gonorrhea
SARS
Head Lice
Ringworms
Boils
Shingles
Something that you can't spell
Meningitis
Measles
Mumps
Ebola Virus
Bunions

*If you have circled any of these, DO NOT turn in your application.

Do you or have you ever used (ingested in any way) any of the following:
(Circle all that apply)

Crack/Cocaine
Heroin
Paint
Markers
Ecstasy
Glue
Bad pills
Snuff anything under the kitchen sink


*If you have circled any of these, DO NOT turn in your application.

By signing below, you agree that all of the information given above is true to the best of your knowledge. For my protection, you will be asked to provide the following information upon request: state ID, birth certificate, recent payroll stub, a recent clean bill of health from a certified physician or practitioner.

Falsifying information may result in termination of this relationship (if applicable), and a severe a** whooping by my project cousins Pookie, Ray-Ray, Darnell, Lil Krazy or all of the above.

Applicant Signature________________________

Print Name_________________________________

Date _______________________

smart girls are sexy

ladies! if you're thinking about "dumbing" yourself down because you think it'll help you get a man. you're so wrong! don't, under any circumstance, think that playing it less intelligent is gonna get you anywhere. it's unattractive to guys. really it is. how do i know? because my guy pal rw told me so.

so there. a chick with brains is something that is still desired by the opposite sex. just in case you're wondering. now go be your smart, sassy selves and go get 'em.

be smart. be blessed.

close but no cigar...

so i've been communicating with a really nice person via the match site. it's eerie how questions i thought about sending, but didn't, were sent for me to answer by him. our preferences, likes, dislikes and beliefs were so in vibe. and even though the communication at this point was going well, i still couldn't help feeling that the other shoe was going to drop any minute.

so we're chugging along with our "stages of communication" and i decide to go ahead and get the BIG question out the way. at least it's a big one for me. i know with the way things are with society now that's having sex outside of marriage really isn't such a big deal. but it's a pretty big deal to me. so i asked this awesome guy how he felt about abstinence and if he felt that it would be a problem for him in a relationship. now i already knew deep down inside what his answer was going to be. but somewhere in the back of my naive little mind i hoped it would be different. sort of hoping against hope.

well, folks, three guesses what the answer was. that's right! that is problem for him. surprise, surprise. now i'm not mad. i'm actually glad that he was honest enough to answer my question. since i was bold enough to ask. i'm not one for surprises so it's better for me to find out now, than be involved and sorely disappointed and heartbroken down the road. the other shoe dropped.

so what am i do to now? well. i don't want to kill a friendship that's barely begun. however, i can't continue on knowing full well that my decision to remain virtuous will be a strain on our relationship. so, if he answers back, i'll have to let him know i stand firm in my decision and if there's no way he can remain celibate, we really won't have a chance. i'll wish him all the best and hope that he finds that special someone he's looking for. unfortunately, it will not be me.

i was chatting with masumi and telling her how i sometimes feel like i'm being punished in some way for my decision. despite all my guy friends telling me that what i'm doing (or not doing) is a wonderful thing. really? then why does crap like this keep happening to me? i meet a really nice person. we hit it off and get along famously until that subject of sex comes up. i share my beliefs and then it's splitsville. i'm not going to back down from my choice. there's really no compromising on this here.

why? because i feel this is what is right for me. my virtue is a gift that i can only give away once and i only plan to share that with my husband. i firmly believe sex between two people is a beautiful experience, but an experience that should only be shared between husband and wife. i believe God wouldn't want it any other way. i make no apologies for that.

i believe i'll be blessed by my obedience to God in that respect. i pray that He'll send someone who'll love me and Him enough to abstain. because i'm doing the same.

be firm in your beliefs. be blessed.