i can't sleep

i need to sleep. i have a long day work tomorrow, followed by a long evening at our aiga-sponsored awards show and party. then off to a great sex-in-the-city-ish type place for dinner with gissy!

i should be studying or sleeping. or both. can i do both? that would totally rock. but i can't. i'm tired for sure. but i can't sleep. it's 12:30 a.m. and i'm too wired. WHY? you ask?

because "sir" and i have just finalized plans to see each other over the Christmas holiday. and he's staying through new years! i've not seen him, hugged him, kissed him since august. that's an eternity in my world! i'm literally too wound up to close my eyes and dream.

i never, ever, EVER in a million years thought i'd feel the way i do about anyone. i sometimes feel like someone else is living this awesome experience and i'm just watching. can it get better than this? yes it can. and now that i've started letting go of all these unfounded insecurities, i'm totally embracing what's to come. i'm allowing myself to be loved by him.

and so Christmas can't get here soon enough for me. i must first, however, figure out what to get sir for a gift. besides passionate kisses. did i mention that the man is an awesomely GREAT kisser? did i ever mention that he's the first man i've EVER kissed? sigh. i digress...

i am feeling a little fatigued now. so i'll need to hop on this train and maybe lull myself to sleep. wow. my gift is literally coming to me on a plane.. sigh. thank you GOD for the wonderful gift you've given me in "sir." You truly couldn't have made him any better. let the countdown begin!

be blessed.