searching

so i'm back in the game again. the first impressions, the nervous flutter in my tummy. wondering if this one is the ONE for me. hesitant to make that move, so i sit and wait to see what happens. get all excited after that initial contact. then i make "plans" for the future, only to be disappointed when it doesn't work out. or even worse, i find out that what i may be interested in is taken. so i sigh and say "well, God's got something better." then i muster up my courage and get back out there again. all the while wondering if the time spent searching was worth it to begin with.

i keep hearing "you'll know it when it comes." "there'll be that feeling, that inkling deep down inside that will tell you - go for it." "that's the one you've been searching for. the one you've been waiting and praying all this time for!" in my inner soul i believe the little whispers of encouragement. after all if he or she can find that perfect fit, so can i. but there's still that little voice that says in a hushed tone, "you'll never find it. why do you even try? you might as well stay where you are."

but i can't! i must press forward. even it means going on countless first encounters to get to that ONE perfect match. there are a lot of disappointments along the way. but with each one, i learn what's right for me; what will make me happy and satisfy my needs. it's a little dispairing at times, but i'm drawing closer to that happy place. so, tomorrow, dust off my shoulders, put on a happy face and clothe myself in that optimistic robe and... just maybe... this time....

that one will be there. waiting for me to fall in love and claim what's mine. boy, shopping for a new home sure is hard :) gotcha!

be blessed!